action, crime, movie, movie review, thriller

Flashback Review: May 30th, 2014 Movie – The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day

the boondock saints 2

Oh, the reaction that this movie caused when it was first announced. I mean, the first movie had become this cult phenomenon among many people, several of my friends included. When it was announced that a sequel would take place, a lot of my friends were really pissed about it, thinking Hollywood had already been making several remakes and sequels that were terrible and they did not need to touch this movie. Now I honestly have no idea how many of my friends saw this movie, or what their opinions of it were if they did see it, but I decided to go ahead and pick up a copy of The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day when it was on the cheap and give it a chance my self.

The plot: 8 years after killing Don “Papa Joe” Yakavetta in a Boston courtroom, Connor and Murphy MacManus are living in Ireland with their father Noah MacManus, the former assassin known as Il Duce. Il Duce is worried that his sons are feeling urges drawing them back to Boston when the village priest arrives at their house and tells them that something has happened. The priest tells them that a priest in Boston was killed in his church, with the killing made to look like the Saints had done it. Connor and Murphy angrily get up from the table and head to the barn, where they dig up the chest containing their weapons and prepare for their journey back to America. The priest asks Noah if he will try to talk them out of it but Noah says that someone had gone to the effort to try and draw them out and it is obvious that it worked. In Boston, Detectives Greenly, Duffy, and Dolly, allies of the Saints, are at the scene of the killing discussing what they should do when FBI Agent Eunice Bloom, who is the protege of Agent Smecker, arrives on the scene and tells them she will be in charge. Meanwhile, Connor and Murphy are on a container ship heading to Boston when they see most of the crew gathered to watch an underground fight. Noticing the men handcuffing a Mexican named Romeo’s hands behind his back, the brothers inquire about what is going on before placing a wager on Romeo, then go talk with him after he wins the fight. Back in Boston, Bloom is able to determine that the Saints were not responsible for the priest’s murder but as the news reporters are not told any details, they poll the public who are split on whether they believe the Saints were responsible or not. Meanwhile, Concezio Yakavetta, the son of Papa Joe, is holding a meeting with his lieutenants, who were upset about not being consulted over his having the priest murdered. Concezio tells them that ever since his father was killed, they have all been living in fear that the Saints would return and finish them off so now he is drawing them out so that he can get rid of them and they can take back control of the streets. At the police station, Bloom tells the chief that all of the evidence points towards Concezio being behind the priest’s killing and when the chief asks why he shouldn’t go public with this information, Bloom tells him to walk with her as she explains her reasoning. Meanwhile, Greenly, Dolly, and Duffy are worried about how bad this will be for them and Greenly says that maybe they won’t even show up in town, prompting Dolly to tell him that they are either in town or on their way. Connor, Murphy, and Romeo have made it to Boston and Romeo drives them to a warehouse, where it is rumored that Concezio has a deal going with some Chinese drug runners. Romeo comes up with a plan to deal with the men in the warehouse but though things don’t go as planned, they still manage to take out all of the men. The next day, Bloom examines the scene of the crime and though there are some inconsistencies in their old pattern, she feels it is the work of the Saints, much to the three detectives chagrin. As Concezio is hiding in a panic room in his home until the Saints are located, Connor, Murphy, and Romeo go to see Romeo’s uncle for information on where Concezio might be and he tells them that Gorgeous George, Concezio’s underboss from Brooklyn, is in town and he would know where he is hiding. At the same time, Bloom pays a visit to George, trying to learn where Concezio is and informing George that he is the low man on the totem pole in Boston and he should be careful. Connor, Murphy, and Romeo learn where George is and head over there, threatening to shoot him if he doesn’t tell him who killed the priest. George tells him that Concezio hired an independent contractor and didn’t tell anybody his plan as they would never have gone with it. Believing his story, the team decides to use George to help them take out the rest of his men by having him schedule a meeting at a Mexican restaurant, where Romeo will be undercover as a bartender. Meanwhile, Bloom, Greenly, Dolly, and Duffy are at a dead end with the prints at the priest’s murder but when Bloom realizes there was a rosary bead but no rosary at the scene, she figures out a new idea to search and has them rush off to see if it pans out. Later that night, Greenly calls Bloom and tells her they got a hit off of George’s bugged phone and after he tells her where the meeting is, she decides to head there alone to scope it out. As George’s men show up, they don’t notice the assassin sitting in his car, who calls his unknown boss and tells him that only Connor and Murphy are there and his boss tells him that if he kills the sons, Il Duce will show up. Connor, Murphy, and Romeo kill all of George’s men, then decide to let George go but as they start to celebrate a well executed plan, the assassin come in the back door and tries to shoot them, only to be wounded by Bloom. As the brothers tell Bloom to drop her weapon, Romeo goes after the assassin but he has already escaped. Bloom tells them that she made a promise to Smecker to help them in their mission and never see the inside of a prison cell, a secret she is keeping from the detectives for her own amusement. She then has Connor, Murphy, and Romeo help her restage the crime scene so that when it is called in, she can explain it as the men fighting over turf as Concezio is losing power. Later, Greenly tells her that her hunch was right and Interpol gave them the identity of the assassin but the circumstances of his visa and everything has now caused him to be flagged. Bloom takes the detectives the Doc’s bar, where Connor and Murphy play a joke on their old friends before they all discuss the situation. Greenly, Dolly, and Duffy tell them they want to help and Connor says that they plan on making their move in 48 hours but Bloom is worried that there is someone else pulling the strings, someone with enough power to push the assassins visa through right after 9/11 had occurred. Back in his penthouse, Concezio has his lieutenants call their men and start regaining their power on the streets. Meanwhile, the assassin is getting his wounds tended too by his boss but when he sees the police report with the assassin listed as the prime suspect in the priest’s murder, he proceeds to whip him with the stolen rosary. Connor, Murphy, and Romeo head to Concezio’s penthouse and, after a few snags in their plan, proceed to kill him and all of his men except for Concezio’s Consigliere, who had ducked into the panic room and locked Concezio out. As Bloom and the detectives examine the scene later, FBI Special Agent Kuntsler shows up and tells Bloom she is suspended and he will be taking over the investigation. As she goes to leave, Bloom tells Kuntsler her theory as to how everything went down and when she finishes next to the panic room, the Consigliere opens the door and drags her inside before closing it again. Inside, he tells Bloom that the events happened exactly how she described which is why he figured she would be the person to talk to. He explains that Concezio was working with a man known only as “The Old Man”, though he had heard that he was sometimes referred to as “The Roman”. At Doc’s bar, Connor and Murphy are making plans to go after the Panza, the assassin, when Greenly shows up to tell them about Bloom being off of the case when he is killed by Panza. Panza then holds Doc hostage and forces them to throw their guns away but before he can shoot them, Noah, who was worried about his sons and decided to come help them, shoots Panza in the arm. As Connor and Murphy try to keep Greenly alive, Noah asks Panza where The Old Man is and when Panza refuses to answer, Noah plays a game of Russian roulette with him and ends up killing him. Noah tells his sons about how he had witnessed his father being killed by mobsters and he hunted them down and killed them, with his friend Louie helping him, albeit reluctantly, but after a while, he would eventually turn Noah over to the police,then assume the identity of The Roman. Bloom uses the FBI’s database to find out Louie’s location and gives it to Noah and the others but, knowing that it won’t be long before Kuntsler finds out what she did, she decides to get out of the country while she can. Noah heads to Louie’s home and confronts him about why he turned him in, unaware that Louie had hired some hit-men to be on the grounds and kill Noah at his signal. When Noah asks Louie why he turned him in, Louie explains that he had been helping the mafia and used Noah to take out some of his competition but when he was no longer useful, he turned him in. Unfortunately, he was also discarded by the mafia as his usefulness had come to an end. When the Saints killed Papa Joe, Louie helped Concezio rebuild the Yakavetta family, then had the priest killed and the Saints framed for it so they would show up and kill Concezio, allowing him to take control. Louie signals the hit-men to attack but Connor, Murphy, and Romeo help Noah kill them. Connor, Murphy, and Romeo are wounded and Noah is fatally shot but with Connor and Murphy helping him up, he is able to kill Louie before he dies. Noah then dies and as Connor and Murphy go to leave, they find themselves surrounded by the FBI and end up surrendering. Some time later, Father Sibeal is escorting a disguised Bloom to a dock, telling her she will be escorted to a sanctuary in a monastery but when she tries to get details, she is shocked to discover that the person taking her to the monastery is Smecker. Smecker explains he faked his death and is working with members or the Catholic Church to provide a network to help and support the Saints and their next mission is to help break them out of prison. Meanwhile, Connor, Murphy, and Romeo are at the Hoag Maximum Security Prison’s medical wing, with Romeo comatose due to his injuries. As protesters outside the prison chant for the release of the Saints, Connor and Murphy get out of bed and look at the prisoners out in the yard, signaling to them not to mess with them or else they will regret it.

The Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day met with poor reviews from the critics, holding a 23% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. The critical consensus on the site is, “This sequel to the cult favorite The Boondock Saints is more of the same — unoriginal, absurd, violent, over-the-top, and occasionally mean-spirited.” The movie had a limited release but in theaters but still managed to pull in $10.6 million off of an $8 million budget. In 2011, there were talks with director Troy Duffy about making a third installment, but fashioning it into a TV series. Norman Reedus and Sean Patrick Flanery both expressed interest in working on this but while things have bounced around between whether it will be a TV series or a third movie, nothing has been finalized yet, though Duffy has been working on a script.

This was a decent movie but honestly felt like a pale comparison of the original. The acting was ok, with the returning characters of Sean Patrick Flanery (Connor) and Norman Reedus (Murphy) doing good jobs in their roles, as well as Billy Connolly (Noah). I did like the returning detectives as some comedic relief, as well as Clifton Collins Jr.’s Romeo, and thought Judd Nelson was great as Concezio but thought that Peter Fonda’s brief appearance as The Roman was almost a waste while Julie Benz’s character was kind of annoying, particularly her overplayed southern accent. The story honestly felt too convoluted with all of the side plots going on. The basic premise of the Saints going to clear their names and get revenge for the priest’s death was fine, but when you add Bloom’s secretly wanting to help them, and the whole situation with Panza and The Roman, it got a little confusing at times. The action scenes were pretty decent, with the same somewhat slow motion retelling that was prominent in the original film. A decent action movie but I would suggest just watching the original movie over this one every time.

Rating: 3 out of 5

Standard
comedy, movie, movie review

August 31st, 2017 Movie – Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday The 13th

shriek if you know what i did last friday the 13th

So in 2000, a parody of horror movies called Scary Movie came out in theaters and it was a massive hit. What most people don’t know is that another parody came out right around the same time, but it was released direct to video instead of being given a theatrical run. Now I remember watching this on USA Network when it first aired and thought it was the most ridiculously funniest movie I had seen in a long time. So when I saw the DVD while wandering Best Buy, I decided to go ahead and buy it. Now let’s see if the comedy still holds up as I watch today’s movie, Shriek If You Know What I Did Last Friday The 13th.

The plot: One night, Screw Frombehind receives a phone call from The Killer, who had dialed her number by mistake. As they are talking, The Killer starts asking Screw some questions but when he falls into her pool, she promptly hangs up on him. As Screw goes back to work on a cake, she accepts a collect call from The Killer and when she gets his question wrong, he suddenly bursts out of the cake and tries to attack her. The Killer chases Screw around the table but stops when he answers the phone, then hands the phone to Screw, who talks to her friend Stacy for a minute before The Killer reminds her that he is there to kill her. The Killer chases Screw outside, where she ends up electrocuting herself with a bug zapper and as The Killer lights up a cigarette, his hockey mask bursts into flames and after he ducks his head into the bird bath to extinguish it, his mask has melted into the Ghost Face mask. The next day, Dawson Deery enrolls at Bulimia Falls High school and is introduced to Slab, Boner, Barbara, and Martina. Dawson and Martina appear to be attracted to each other but when Dawson notices that Martina is in a softball uniform, he wonders if she is a lesbian. As the 5 kids head through the halls, Martina is telling them about Screw’s murder, no noticing that The Killer attempts to kill a student behind them. When they head outside, they are confronted by Hagitha Utslay, a reporter for EmpTV News, who is keen on interviewing Dawson, as she had written a book accusing him of the murder of his family. Dawson punches out Hagitha but she is picked up by Doughy, Barbara’s brother who works as mall security. Doughy says he is working the case as The Killer mask was stolen from the store and as the kids leave, Hagitha and Doughy start flirting. unaware that The Killer is killing Hagitha’s cameraman. As the kids head to their classes, Martina, Boner, Slab, and Barbara each receive a note from The Killer saying he knows what they did last summer/semester/chanukah/period respectively. This causes all of them to remember the time they were driving and hit a deer and got rid of the body, but also their own secrets. Martina forgot to give her grandmother her laxative, Boner forgot to deliver a letter to the governor for his brother, resulting in his brother’s death, Slab smoked his grandfather’s ashes, and Barbara ripped the tag off of a mattress. As they all sit down to lunch, Martina and the others reveal their notes and believes The Killer is targeting them and just as Boner says that Dawson didn’t get a note, Dawson finds one in his food. As he looks at it, Dawson remembers how his dad got drunk and dressed him up in a deer costume and forced him to lick a salt lick but Dawson ran out of the house when his dad passed out on the floor, who then caused an explosion when he farted into the fireplace resulting in the house blowing up, while Dawson ended up being hit by Slab in the others, as he was still wearing the deer costume, and they dump his body into the ocean. Worried about being attacked by The Killer, the group decides to find a place to stay the night where they can be safe and they end up deciding to stay at Slab’s house. As the school day continues, Dawson and the others each encounter The Killer but manage to escape. The Killer then goes to kill “The Administrator formerly known as Principal” but instead watches as the principal is hit in the head with a skillet and falls into his hot tub, electrocuting himself. After the kids give their statement to the police about their attacks, and interrupting Hagitha’s interview of Doughy, the kids all head over to Slab’s house and throw a party while Doughy, Hagitha, and her latest cameraman (as she has already lost three) are keeping watch outside. As the kids go to watch a movie, Barbara says she doesn’t like parodies and goes to get another beer. As Martina tries to explain the rules of being in a parody, Boner has taken an unconscious woman upstairs in order to try and lose his virginity but when The Killer shows up, he ends up having a heart attack. The Killer then goes after Barbara in the garage and as she attempts to escape through the cat door, she gets stuck and The Killer tries to kill her by opening the door. However, someone outside is pressing a remote that cause the motor to overheat, allowing Barbara enough time to take out her breast implants and escape. The Killer chases after her with a weed wacker as she runs through the bushes but before he can kill her, she is stung by some bees and dies from an allergic reaction, while The Killer is dejected at first but then comments on the good job he did sculpting animals into the bushes while he was attacking her. Inside, one of the kids tells everyone about The Administrator Formerly Knows As Principal’s body being discovered and most of the kids leave to go see it. Dawson and Martina end up alone and Martina tells Dawson she wants to have sex with him. When they hear a noise and find one of Slab’s cats in the kitchen, they go looking for Slab only to find him overdosing on steroids and exploding. The Killer shows up and they run for it, which ends up being turned into a music video. When they are forced to confront The Killer, Martina ends up knocking him out and they go to reveal who The Killer really is, only to find that he is wearing multiple masks. While all of this is going on, Doughy, Hagitha, her cameraman, and a pizza delivery man are playing strip poker when Doughy hears something and they go to head inside. Dawson removes the last mask to reveal The Killer as Hardy, Doughy’s identical twin cousin. When Doughy, Hagitha, and the others arrive, Doughy is shocked at learning his cousin is The Killer but decides to forgive him only for Hagitha to accidentally shoot him and then her cameraman when she uses her gun as a mirror to put on lipstick. Hagitha ends up leaving with the pizza man, leaving Doughy heartbroken as he leaves the house with Dawson and Martina. As the authorities show up, Boner is found to still be alive, as he had taken a bottle of Viagra, which kept his blood flowing. An attractive doctor sees his condition and says she will take care of him, and Boner is excited as he will finally lose his virginity. Dawson and Martina kiss just as The Killer starts to rise up from the gurney but Doughy, who was standing nearby at catering, quickly shoots him. Feeling the danger is now over, Dawson and Martina go for a walk in the woods when Dawson receives a call from a new Killer, but his cell reception is bad so he hangs up and The Killer, who was calling from a nearby pay phone, gets angry and chases after them.

I will admit that some of the comedy lost it’s charm, but this is still a funny movie due to it’s ridiculousness. The acting was ok, with all of the actors doing a decent job in their roles but nobody really stood out. The plot was primarily a parody of Scream and followed that movie pretty closely but also parodied numerous other movies or TV shows; including Nightmare On Elm Street, I Know What You Did Last Summer, Child’s Play, Friday The 13th, Dawson’s Creek, Airplane, Grease, There’s Something About Mary, Porky’s, and Christine. My favorite parody though was Coolio, whose character was a parody Prince, as the whole “Administrator formerly known as Principal” absolutely cracked me up for some reason. The sight gags throughout the movie focused on a lot of pop culture at the time, such as Barbara mimicking the Mentos commercials in order to escape The Killer in the bathroom. Absolutely silly and ridiculous but you can’t help but find yourself laughing as you watch it.

Rating: 3 1/2 out of 5

Standard