action, adventure, movie, movie review, sci-fi

January 16th, 2018 Movie – Roller Blade Warriors: Taken By Force

roller blade warriors - taken by force

Ok, I know what you are thinking. I said I was done with the Roller Blade Seven movies yesterday, and technically that is true. However, if you have ever bought a movie on Amazon, you know that sometimes they will recommend another movie to go with it. That was the case with this movie, which I decided to buy along with the Roller Blade Seven Trilogy during a drunken Amazon night. Funny thing is that this movie was actually directed by the same man that directed the Roller Blade Seven trilogy. So let’s see what this earlier work looks like with today’s movie, Roller Blade Warriors: Taken By Force.

The plot: In an apocalyptic future, Karin Crosse, a warrior nun, is escorting a young psychic named Gretchen Hope to a monastery, killing off the occasional mutant that attacks them. Meanwhile, Streak and Karp are preparing a sacrifice for the psychic creature that there boss uses but when the creature discovers that the woman they brought it was actually a man, it eviscerates him and throws his body outside the building. Rinaldi tells them to find a virgin for the sacrifice and they grab Marachek and Kosai and head out into Hell’s Anvil to find one. When Karin’s horse dies, they find an old bicycle and use their robes to fashion a sail so they can continue to their destination. After stopping to get some water at a small oasis, Karin wants to keep moving but Gretchen convinces her to let her rest for a while. Elsewhere, a trio of rollerblade warriors, led by Karin’s sister Sharon, reach a crossroads in the desert and the rookie, Miko, asks to explore on her own. At the same time, Streak and the others meet up with Johnny Topp, who leads Streak and Marachek to a slave trader that has some women fr sell. While they are gone, Kosai smells a woman nearby so he and Karp go look for her. They find Miko and attempt to capture her but when Miko resists, Kosai ends up killing her. Sharon and Valijean go looking for Miko and after finding her body, go seeking vengeance on her killers. They find Streak, Marachek, and Johnny returning with some slaves and attack them, killing Johnny and chasing off Streak and Marachek, then free the slaves and take them to their mission. Karin and Gretchen make camp for the night but Gretchen wakes up screaming that there is evil around them. Streak and the others have found Karin and Gretchen’s bike and begin hunting for them. Karin attacks and kills a miner that was nearby but Karp throws a rock at her head and sends her falling off the cliff. Rinaldi and the others grab Gretchen and take her back to Abadon. Gretchen, who wasn’t dead, begins receiving psychic contacts from Gretchen and heads out to rescue her. At the same time, Mother Speed senses that Gretchen is in danger and sends Sharon and Valijean out to rescue her. Karin reaches Abadon and is stopped by the gate keeper, Old Turkel, and is forced to kill him when he refuses to let her enter. Taking Turkel’s sword to replace her broken one, Karin heads inside to find Gretchen and is pointed towards the saloon, where Streak is known to hang out. After Karin gets in a fight with a miner named Lyle, the leader of Abadon, Rinaldi, shows up and offers to help her find Gretchen. As they walk around the palce, Rinaldi explains that Abadon is an abandoned uranium mining facility but it has been shut down long ago. When Karin gets images of Gretchen being raped, Rinaldi grows angry and says they should split up to find her. Rinaldi heads to a room where Gretchen is being molested by Karp, Kosai, and Marachek and proceeds to beat them, then asks where Streak is. Streak is back at the saloon talking with Tawny and trying to convince her to side with him when he kills Rinaldi and takes over. When Rinaldi enters the saloon, Streak tries to pull a knife on him but Karin enters and cuts his hand, allowing Rinaldi to shoot Streak. Karin says she came back because the feelings from Gretchen were strongest here and Rinaldi says that Streak killed her and dumped her in the well full of nuclear waste. Rinaldi takes Karin to a room in the saloon so she can rest and Tawny asks him why he doesn’t kill her but Rinaldi says that he likes her and plans on using her. Rinaldi then dons his protective radiation suit and grabs Gretchen from the back room and takes her into the stacks, where he chains her to a frame as the sacrifice. Receiving more psychic visions, Karin yells to be let out of the room and Tawny opens the door and leads Karin to the stacks, explaining about the creature and why women are sacrificed to it. When they reach the stacks, Tawny asks Karin to spare Rinaldi, as she loves him and is pregnant with his child, and Karin assures her that her mission is to rescue Gretchen. Heading inside the stacks, Karin locates Gretchen and sets her free but as they try to escape, Rinaldi locks the door. He then hears Tawny calling out for Karin and after accusing her of betraying him, shoots her. Back in the stacks, Karin and Gretchen are chased by the creature and Karin begins fighting with it, seemingly killing it. After Karin and Gretchen make their way out of the stacks, the creature follows them but and jumps at them but they dodge it’s attack and it ends up falling to it’s death. As Karin and Gretchen try to figure out a way out, they are confronted by Karp, Kosai, and Marachek. Karin and Gretchen are joined by Sharon and Valijean and the three warriors split up and deal with the three men. When Rinaldi shows up to confront Karin, she skates after him and Rinaldi tries to shoot her with his robotic arm but misses and Karin is able to grab it and kill him with his own weapon. The four women then leave Abadon and head to the mission, where Mother Speed welcomes Gretchen to the sisterhood and tells her to prepare for her role as a roller blade warrior.

Well, I will say this, at least this movie had a straight forward plot. That being said, this is honestly nothing better than some cheap sexploitation movie. The acting was bad, with several of the characters coming off as robotic sounding. The story kind of made sense but really felt weak and seemed to leave some plot holes that never get explained. The special effects were pretty weak while the fight scenes were so slow paced that they just felt boring. Well. hopefully I learned my lesson after this series of movies and will refrain from buying some that are this bad to watch.

Rating: 1 out of 5

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action, adventure, movie, movie review, sci-fi, superhero

January 10th, 2018 Movie – Spider-Man: Homecoming

spider-man homecoming

In 2016, fans eagerly awaited the first installment of the 3rd phase of the MCU; Captain America: Civil War. However, when the second trailer for the movie was released, fans got a thrill when it was shown that Spider-Man had been added to the line up. This was a major deal as even though Disney owns the rights to Marvel Comics, the film rights to several franchises still belonged to other companies; with Fox owning the rights to the X-Men and Fantastic Four and Sony Pictures owning the rights to Spider-Man. The fact that Disney and Sony worked out a deal for Spider-Man to be a part of the MCU was huge and taken as a sign that other deals could possibly occur. Anyways, since a new actor was cast as Spider-Man, Sony scrapped it’s idea for a third installment in the series starring Andrew Garfield and came up with a new movie, one that continued the adventures of the Spider-Man introduced in Civil War. I will admit that I wasa little bit hesitant to get my hopes up over a new Spider-Man movie but having enjoyed the brief glimpse of him in Civil War, I was actually looking forward to seeing what they would do. So let’s have some fun with today’s movie, Spider-Man: Homecoming.

The plot: After the Battle of New York, a salvage crew run by Adrian Toomes is working on cleaning up the debris left from the Chitauri invasion when there work is taken over by the Department of Damage Control, a joint effort spearheaded by Tony Stark and the U.S. Government to keep the alien technology out of the wrong hands. Later that night, as Toomes and his crew watch a news report and lament the death of their business, one of Toomes workers points out that they have a truck full of Chitauri technology that they had already salvaged and Toomes says to keep it instead of turning it over. 8 years later, Toomes and his men have used the stolen technology to manufacture weapons to sell, along with creating a set of flight wings that Toomes uses. Meanwhile, Peter Parker is escorted to Berlin by Happy Hogan and given a new suit by Tony Stark for when he helps in the fight with Captain America and his group of heroes that refuse to register under the Sokovia Accords. Peter makes a video diary of his trip, including some portions of the fight, and afterwards, Tony helps him make an alibi for his Aunt May before dropping off Peter at his apartment and telling him he will call when he has a new mission for him, telling him Happy will be his handler. Peter returns to going to school at Midtown School of Science and Technology but his mind is constantly wondering when he will get a new mission, which is interfering with his school life. After school, Peter changes into his Spider-Man costume and leaves a message for Happy asking for his next mission before he goes out to stop any crimes he can see. Later that night, Spider-Man sees some men using high tech weaponry to rob a bank ATM and tries to stop it but when an errant blast destroys a nearby corner bodega, Spider-Man goes to rescue the shop’s owner, allowing the robbers to escape. When Peter tries calling Happy about what happened, Happy tells him he can’t talk, as he is busy moving all of Stark’s things to his new place in upstate New York. Peter sneaks back into his apartment and is surprised to find his best friend Ned waiting for him in his room. Ned is shocked in discovering that Peter is Spider-Man and wants to know all about it and Peter tells him they will talk tomorrow at school. At school, Ned constantly asks Peter questions about how he became Spider-Man and the other Avengers and Peter tells him to keep quiet. When they overhear a classmate Liz, whom Peter has a crush on, mention that she thinks Spider-Man is cute, Ned blurts out that Peter knows Spider-Man. Peter tries to play it off as a joke but another classmate, Flash, taunts them into inviting Spider-Man to Liz’s party that night. Peter and Ned show up at the party, but Peter feels like it is a mistake to go there. When Flash proceeds to mock them for not producing Spider-Man, Peter heads outside to change into Spider-Man but notices a glowing light in the distance and heads out to investigate. He sees two men, Herman Schultz and Brice, attempting to sell some alien weapons and tries to stop them but Brice, who calls himself The Shocker, punches him with his sonic gauntlet and they drive off, with Schultz calling Toomes to explain what happened. Spider-Man chases after them but is grabbed by Toomes, in his Vulture gear, and flown up into the air before being dropped into a lake. A parachute deploys from Spider-Man’s suit but he becomes tangled up in it and almost drowns when he hits the lake but he is saved by a remote piloted Iron-Man suit. Tony chastises Peter via the suit and tells him that he isn’t ready to be an Avenger and he should continue helping the little guys before flying off and as Peter heads home, he discovers a piece of alien technology that Brice and Schultz left behind. Meanwhile, back at their lair, Toomes chastises Brice for being too flashy in selling the weapons and kicks him off the team and when Brice threatens to tell Toomes’ wife about what he is doing, Toomes grabs a weapon and accidentally kills him, then hands the gauntlet to Schultz and says he is the new Shocker. The next day, Peter and Ned are examining the alien device at school and later, Peter sees Schultz and another guy at the school looking for it. Peter manages to tag them with a tracer and when he and Ned discover that they have headed to Maryland, he rejoins the school’s Academic Decathlon which is heading to compete in Washington D.C., which pisses of Flash as Peter is given his spot on the team. As they head to D.C., Peter is contacted by Happy, who had noticed Peter leaving New York due to his suit’s tracking chip but when Peter tells him it is a school trip, Happy says it is fine. When they get to their hotel, Peter has Ned help him disable the tracking chip and Ned learns that Peter’s suit had been placed in training mode so Peter has him disable it. After donning his suit, Peter is contacted by the suit’s computer, Karen, who helps him locate the tracker and he finds them planning to hijack a S.H.I.E.L.D. shipment of items from the Triskelion wreckage. Peter sees the Vulture fly down and make his way inside one of the trucks and when he tries to stop him, Spider-Man ends up getting trapped in the truck and knocked unconscious. When he comes too, he finds himself trapped inside Damage Control’s storage vault. Spending some time learning his new suit’s capabilities with Karen’s help, Spider-Man learns that the Chitauri artifact that he had could be explosive due to exposure to his own radioactive blood. Spider-Man managed to get out of the vault and makes his way to D.C., trying to contact Ned and warn him but their call is disrupted when Ned’s cellphone goes through the x-ray machine. Ned and the rest of Peter’s class, except for MJ, are in the elevator going to the top of the Washington Monument when the device explodes, damaging the elevator and part of the monument. When Spider-Man there, Karen helps guide him to the quickest way inside and he manages to rescue all of his classmates. Back in their hideout, Toomes is upset at Spider-Man’s interference in his plans and he decides to kill him and Schultz points out how Spider-Man rescued the kids from Midtown. Back in New York, Peter is in detention for skipping out on the decathlon event but decides to leave and head back home. Once there, he has Karen replay the footage from the arms deal he broke up and while there is no criminal background on Brice and Schultz, she does find one for Aaron Davis, the man who was there to buy the weapons. Spider-Man goes to question Davis about the crooks and, since Spider-Man saved his life, he tells them that they are meeting on the Staten Island Ferry. Spider-Man heads out there and using his reconnaissance drone, spots Schultz speaking with Toomes before heading out to speak with Mac Gargan As Spider-Man is recording the arms deal going on, he is contacted by Stark, who congratulates him on his rescue in D.C. but Spider-Man cuts him off to try and stop the arms deal. As he deals with Schultz and Gargan’s men, the FBI show up and tell Spider-Man to stand down. Toomes, alerted to Spider-Man’s presence, quickly dons his gear and begins to attack Spider-Man. Spider-Man fights back and attempts to disarm him but the weapon suddenly discharges randomly and ends up cutting the ferry in half. Spider-Man attempts to save the ferry but his webbing breaks and the ferry starts to sink until Iron Man arrives and saves it. Afterwards, Tony meets with Peter and admonishes him for his actions, and when Peter argues that Tony didn’t listen to him, Tony reveals that he did listen and trusted him, which is why he contacted the FBI so they could handle it. Tony then confiscates the suit from him and when Peter argues that he is nothing without the suit, Tony tells him that if he feels like he isn nothing without the suit, then maybe he isn’t meant to be a hero. When Peter returns home, Aunt May yells at him for worrying her and sneaking out and Peter tells her that he lost the Stark Internship. Peter goes back to being a high school student, trying to get his life back on track, and ends up asking Liz to Homecoming and she accepts. When Peter goes to pick up Liz for Homecoming, he is shocked to discover  that Liz’s father is Toomes. Toomes offers to drive Liz and Peter to the dance and during the drive, he talks with Peter and as Liz comments about how Peter mysteriously vanished at times, he figures out that Peter is actually Spider-Man. When they arrive at the school, Toomes speaks with Peter alone and thanks him for saving Liz’s life, then warns him to stay away from him and don’t interfere or else he will kill everyone he loves. Peter heads inside the school but as he approaches Liz, he realizes he can’t let Toomes get away with what he has planned and apologizes to Liz before leaving the gym. Peter grabs his old Spider-Man suit from it’s hiding space and heads outside only to be confronted by Schultz, who Toomes had sent there in case Peter decided to try and stop him. Losing his web shooters, Spider-Man is knocked into a school bus and sent tumbling over but when Schultz goes to finish him off, he is distracted by Ned, who had grabbed one of Spider-Man’s web shooters and fired it at Schultz. Spider-Man knocks out Schultz, then explains what is going on to Ned and asks him to trace his phone, which he had left in Toomes’ car, and to contact Happy. Ned manages to contact Happy, who quickly hangs up on him, and when he tells Spider-Man where his phone is, Peter figures out that Toomes is planning on hijacking the plane that is transferring materials from Stark Tower to the Avenger’s new facility. Spider-Man heads into the warehouse to confront Toomes, who tries to reason with him but was merely distracting him to allow time for his flight suit to enter the bulding and destroy the support columns, causing the roof to collapse onto Spider-Man. As Toomes leaves and prepares to fly off after the plane, Peter panics and calls out for someone to help him until he sees his reflection in a pool of water and hear’s Tony’s words coming back to haunt him. Proving he has what it takes, Spider-Man frees himself from the debris and manages to snag Toomes with a webline, being yanked behind him as he flies into the air. Toomes reaches the plane, which is being computer piloted, and makes his way inside, copying the transponder to a drone which he sends flying to where the plane was supposed to go while he steers it on a different flight path.  When Spider-Man attempts to enter the plane, Toomes sees him and heads outside to fight him, battling him along the surface of the plane. The plane loses control and Spider-Man attempts to steer it away from the buildings while ToomesToomes breaks inside and attempts to grab something so the heist was not a complete waste. The plane eventually crashes on the beach outside Coney Island and as Spider-Man picks himself up, Toomes renews his attack on him. Toomes gets the upper hand and after knocking Spider-Man down, attempts to grab a crate with his damaged wingsuit. Spider-Man notices the wingsuit is about to explode and tries to stop him but fails, and as Toomes takes off, the suit explodes and he goes crashing to the ground. Spider-Man pulls Toomes from the wreckage and leaves him webbed up to the crates for Happy and the authorities to find. The next day at school, Peter thanks Ned for helping save his life then goes to talk with Liz only to find that she is moving with her mom, as her dad doesn’t want her in town during the trial. Happy meets Peter at his school and takes him to the Avenger’s facility, where Tony offers him a new suit and a spot on the team, saying he earned it and has a room full of reporters ready to greet the new member. Peter thanks Tony but turns him down, choosing to help the little guys for the time being. As he goes to leave, Peter asks if this was a test and Tony says it was but after Peter walks away, Pepper Potts exits the room and asks where Peter is. Tony tells her that he made a mature decision, which surprised him, and when Pepper asks what she should tells the reporters, as they are expecting a story, Tony asks Happy if he still has the ring and Happy says he had been holding onto it for years, then tosses it to Tony as he and Pepper go to announce their engagement. Peter returns home and finds that Tony had left the Spider-Man suit for him in his room and as he tries it on, Aunt May sees him from the doorway and yells. Meanwhile, in prison, Toomes is approached by Mac Gargan, who says he heard a rumor that Toomes knew Spider-Man’s identity but Toomes lies to Gargan, saying if he knew who Spider-Man was, he would be dead.

Spider-Man: Homecoming was highly praised by the critics, holding a certified fresh rating of 92% on Rotten Tomatoes. The critical consensus on the site is, “Spider-Man: Homecoming does whatever a second reboot can, delivering a colorful, fun adventure that fits snugly in the sprawling MCU without getting bogged down in franchise-building.” Originally, Nick Fury was going to play the role of Peter’s mentor, mirroring the dynamic in The Ultimate Spider-Man cartoon, but the change was made to have Tony Stark fill the role instead. J.K. Simmons had expressed an interest in reprising his role of J. Jonah Jameson from the Sam Raimi trilogy but it was scrapped when he took the role of Commissioner Gordon in Justice League. The movie was a box office success, earning $880.2 million off of a $175 million budget, with Sony and Marvel both agreeing to make a sequel, which is slated for a 2019 release.

My faith in movies was restored as this was a great movie to watch. While I think Spider-Man 2 is probably the best overall movie in the franchise, this is definitely a close second and might end up topping it down the road. The acting was great, with Tom Holland doing a great job as Peter Parker, while Michael Keaton was equally good as Adrian Toomes. I loved Jacob Batalon as Ned, who made for some great comedic sidekick material, and I honestly didn’t get the hate directed towards Zendaya, who was really good as Michelle (though I guess the hate was directed to her wanting to be called MJ at the end of the movie). The story was really good and did a good job showing the emotional growth Peter went through; from being the impulsive teenager that wanted nothing more to be an Avenger and felt like everything else was beneath him to realizing that if he wanted to become an Avenger, he would have to do some growing up first. The one thing I was glad that didn’t occur in the movie was the origin/killing of Uncle Ben. At this point, everyone knows how Spider-Man got his powers and he was spurred to becoming a hero by the death of his Uncle Ben. Since the series was rebooted less than 10 years ago, there was really no need to have that rehashed. Besides, since we were introduced to an already powered up Spider-Man, it made no sense to try and rehash it. I also liked the interaction between Spider-Man and Karen, his suit’s on-board computer system, and the chemistry they developed in the short time Peter had the suit. The one thing that I thought was interesting was how the director decided to make this something of a tribute to John Hughes as far as the high school aspects of the movie went. The funniest part was the deliberate nod to Ferris Bueller’s Day Off during the scene where Spider-Man was chasing after Schultz and Brice through the neighborhood. The special effects were great and while the Vulture suit wasn’t quite like the comics, which honestly is kind of a good thing, it was unique enough to look good on camera. A great movie that is well worth it’s spot in Marvel’s Cinematic Universe.

Rating: 4 1/2 out of 5

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adventure, comedy, movie, movie review, sci-fi

January 9th, 2018 Movie – Man With The Screaming Brain

man with the screaming brain

Time to say goodbye to the horror genre and get back to the good old fun campy B-movies that I love. Today’s movie is the second of two original movies made for Sci-Fi Channel (yes, back before they changed their name to Syfy for marketing purposes) that starred Bruce Campbell. I remember seeing the commercials for this movie before it’s debut and thinking it looked incredibly silly, but a lot of fun to watch. Unfortunately, I didn’t catch it when it debuted because of other things happening at the time but I would catch it when it was replayed and enjoyed it immensely. So let’s have some fun with today’s movie, Man With The Screaming Brain.

The plot: In Bulgaria, a gypsy named Tatoya is trying to find a husband but when the men she selects rejects her, she proceeds to kill them. Meanwhile, William Cole, a wealthy CEO, has arrived in Bulgaria with his wife Jackie for business but is unhappy at how “unAmerican” the country is. Tired of waiting for his ride to pick them up, he hires a Russian cab driver named Yegor to take them to their hotel. Elsewhere, Pavel is having fun with a robot creation when his boss, Dr. Ivanov, calls him over to show him he has succeeded in creating a drug that will allow two brain cells to be successfully and safely merged. With his trials looking successful, he tells Pavel that William Cole is going to be coming to their company and hopefully invest in it but as he celebrates with Pavel, he doesn’t notice the calls on his slide disintegrating. Back in the cab, William continues to complain about how things are in Bulgaria, insulting Yegor for not being more American. When they get stuck in traffic, William asks Yegor to find another way to the hotel and they end up driving through Gypsy Town. As they drive through the neighborhood, they almost hit Tatoya, who stares them all down before moving aside so they can keep driving. After an encounter with some would-be car thieves, Yegor arrives at the hotel and William offers him some more money to be his driver for the duration of his trip and asks that he take Jackie shopping after dropping him off at his meeting. After getting settled into the hotel, William leaves for his meeting and bumps into the maid, who happens to be Tatoya, and recognizes her but can’t remember from where. Learning that William is in town, Dr. Ivanov her Pavel type up a letter to send to him but after Ivanov leaves the room, Pavel decides to write a different letter instead. As William attends a meeting to complete an unfinished mass transportation system through the country, Yegor takes Jackie shopping but the two end up flirting and eventually having sex in Yegor’s cab. After his meeting, William tries to get a hold of Yegor but fails so he is given a ride back to his hotel. When he gets there, Pavel meets him outside and delivers his letter to him but William refuses to go with him. When William enters his room, he finds Tatoya in there and after talking for a few minutes, they end up kissing, but Tatoya uses the opportunity to pick William’s pockets. William pushes her away when she says they belong together just as Jackie shows up. Tatoya quickly leaves and as William and Jackie argue, William discovers he was robbed while Jackie decides to leave him. William heads down to the employee’s area of the hotel and confronts Tatoya, who runs away from him. When he follows her outside, Tatoya hits him in the head with a pipe, splitting open his head. Yegor, who had seen Jackie running from the hotel, goes to see what happened and finds Tatoya standing over William’s body. Yegor asks her what she has done and it is revealed that they were engaged and that the ring Yegor gave William was actually their wedding ring and Tatoya ends up killing Yegor as well. When the bodies are discovered, Jackie is told that they can keep his body alive with machines but the brain damage he suffered makes William essentially brain dead and so she tells them to pull the plug. Jackie then heads to Gypsy Town to confront Tatoya but as the two fight, Tatoya grabs Jackie and throws her down the stairs, killing her. Dr. Ivanov and Pavel grab the bodies of William and Yegor and use parts of Yegor’s brain to repair the damaged portions of William’s brain. After the surgery, Ivanov revives William and tries to explain what happened but William begins having flashbacks to his death, but seen through someone else’s eyes. A panicked William races out of the lab and as he wanders through the city, he starts hearing Yegor’s voice, and it is shown that Yegor is able to control the left half of his body. Deciding to try and work together to survive, Yegor instructs William into stealing a car, getting some clothes, and getting some food. As they are in a restaurant, they read a newspaper and see an article about William and Jackie’s deaths, causing William to remember who he is and who he is sharing the brain with. Suddenly, William screams out that his brain is on fire and works on trying to cool down, then comes to an agreement with Yegor to go get revenge on Tatoya for killing them both. Meanwhile, Ivanov and Pavel grab Jackie’s body and place her brain into a robot doll that Pavel had built. When they turn it on, Jackie gains control of the robot and heads off to get revenge on Tatoya and Ivanov sends Pavel off to recapture her. After mistakenly grabbing a woman who looks like the robot, Pavel sees Jackie get on a bus and tells Ivanov the bad news. Jackie eventually finds Tatoya trying on wedding dresses and attacks her but Tatoya manages to shoot Jackie and escape. As she is leaving, William sees her and chases after her, eventually jumping onto the hood of her car to try and stop her. Tatoya ends up wrecking her car to avoid running into Pavel’s van, who is knocked unconscious when he wrecks. William finds his leg pinned under the car, which is leaking fuel, and Tatoya lights it on fire in order to kill him. As the flames head towards the car, Jackie lifts the car off of William and tells him to run and he does before it explodes, seemingly killing Jackie. William follows Tatoya into a bar, where she tells the patrons that he raped her on her wedding day. The bar patrons proceed to beat up William but he manages to fight back and beat them but when he gets outside, he collapses as the serum starts to break down. Tatoya tries running but the damaged Jackie grabs her and attempts to throw her off the bridge but Tatoya stabs her in the head and then throws her off the bridge. Seeing this happen, William chases after Tatoya, who makes her way down into the sewers, and the two end up fighting. When Tatoya tries to stab William, she ends up falling over the railing and grabs on to keep from falling into the water below. William grabs her and lifts her back onto the edge but does so only to take the ring off of her finger before letting her fall to her death. As William exits the sewer, he sees Jackie’s body and goes to see her, finding her almost out of power. Pavel shows up and William begs him to help her so he tries to jump start her battery to preserve her life. Pavel is successful and Jackie has enough power to say goodbye to William before her power shuts down, with William collapsing shortly afterwards. Ivanov calls Pavel, saying he solved the problem with the serum breaking down and Pavel explains what happened. Ivanov tells Pavel to bring the bodies back to his lab and after Pavel hangs up, he sees Tatoya’s body floating down the water and quickly grabs her out to use as well. Some time later, it is shown that Ivanov’s procedure has worked, as William is returned to life, with Yegor’s voice still in his head, and that Jackie’s brain was placed in Tatoya’s body, with the two having renewed their love for each other.

This is a really funny movie to watch and a great parody to some of the classic sci-fi movies from the 50’s, Bruce Campbell (William) was great, with equal parts physical comedy and tongue in cheek dialogue making for a lot of funny moments, especially when he would be arguing with Yegor about what they should do. Stacy Keach (Ivanov) and Ted Raimi (Pavel) were both great in their roles as well, doing good jobs as the mad scientist and bumbling assistant respectively. The story was pretty good and really seemed to have fun parodying some classic movies, such as The Thing With Two Heads and The Brain That Wouldn’t Die. There wasn’t a lot of special effects involved but the few times they were involved looked really good. On the flip side, I thought the pure fakeness of the robot Jackie made for a lot of laughs and really added to the charm of the movie. A great movie worth watching if you need some laughs and are just in the mood for some mindless entertainment.

Rating: 3 1/2 out of 5

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January 2nd, 2018 Movie – Alien Apocalypse

alien apocalypse

One thing I can count on my friends for is to help enable my movie addiction by buying me more movies. One of the DVD’s I got was a triple feature of movies starring Bruce Campbell. Now I have been a fan of Bruce Campbell ever since I first saw The Evil Dead many years ago. I have always thought he was an entertaining actor and enjoyed just about every movie or TV show he is. Today’s movie is one of two movies that were pitched to Sci-Fi back when they were cranking out original movies on a weekly basis. Let’s see how entertaining it is as I watch Alien Apocalypse.

The plot: Dr. Ivan Hood and his associates Kelly, Captain Chuck Burkes, and Aida crash land back on Earth near Portland, Oregon after spending 40 years in cryo-sleep in space. After leaving their shuttle, they comment on the lack of radio communication as they were landing when they discover Portland in ruins and the forest surrounding it completely wiped from existence. They quickly hide when they see a group of human slaves being marched through the wasteland by some bounty hunters but are soon captured by some more bounty hunters. When Chuck tries to speak with the men, the men strike him and quickly gag Chuck and the others and start them marching with the other slaves, killing Aida when she falls behind due to her broken leg. They eventually reach a saw mill, where Ivan, Kelly, and Chuck notice some strange structures nearby while other slaves are cutting down trees and turning them into boards. The three are forced to work on moving some boards before the men that captured them take them to speak with the “Mites”, a race of humanoid locusts. Chuck tries to question the Mites about where they came from but the Mites’ leader says he isn’t showing them respect and has his subordinates kill him by biting off his head. Kelly explains that they had been in space for the past 40 years and the leader tells them that if they work hard then they will live, then dismisses them as he is brought a bowl of human fingers to eat. Outside, Ivan speaks with the bounty hunters and ask why they are helping the Mites and the bounty hunters say that it is better than being a slave before sending them down to the slaves’ underground sleeping pens. In the pens, Ivan and Kelly try to get some answers and speak with a man named Jeff, who explains what happened while they were gone. Jeff explains that the Mites dropped EMP bombs to shut down technology before they invaded 20 years ago and they were here for the planet’s wood, which they send back to their home planet. Alex, a young slave, tells them that the president is still alive and gathering an army to attack the Mites and free them all but Jeff says that is just a myth. Kelly agrees that 20 years is a long time to wait for a rescue and Ivan says they should work on trying to escape. Ivan and Kelly work on digging an escape tunnel at night while they are forced to continue working to log the trees during the day. After several days/weeks, Kelly is grabbed by some of the guards and locked onto a post to be punished when Ivan attacks the guards and frees her. After they knock out the guards, Ivan shouts out “Freedom” to the other slaves, hoping to rally them, but Alex is the only one willing to go with them. As they try to sneak out of camp, they encounter a Mite and Ivan kills it, shocking Alex, and grabs it’s weapon while Kelly grabs a bounty hunter’s rifle as they quickly make their way out of the camp, with the other bounty hunters giving chase. Kelly shoots some of their pursuers but is soon captured when she is knocked unconscious by an explosion. Meanwhile, Ivan and Alex manage to make it up to a cliff and Ivan tries to use the alien weapon on their pursuers but when it fires, the shock sends both Ivan and Alex falling into the water below them and the bounty hunters believe they have been killed. Ivan and Alex manage to swim to shore, where they encounter a woman named Bizzi, who shelters them before leading them to her village. In Bizzi’s village, Freedom Valley, Ivan speaks with Issac, the village leader, and they learns that President Demsky is supposed to be gathering his army in the nearby Cascade Mountains so Ivan wants to go there to either prove he is still alive or that he is dead, and if he is alive, return with his army to free Kelly and the other slaves. Meanwhile, Kelly is tortured and taken back to the slave pen but when she regains consciousness, Jeff tells her that the fact that Ivan had killed one of the Mites has gotten all of the other slaves talking, as well as the bounty hunters. Ivan, Alex, and Bizzi begin their journey and after witnessing some bounty hunters killing some slaves trying to escape, Ivan sees a wounded slave and manages to heal him after the bounty hunters leave. The slave, Tyler, joins them and they continue to the mountains, recruiting more members to their group including Fisherman Bob and a bounty hunter. When they reach the mountains, they are met by Mountain Man Bill, who says he knows where Demsky is and leads them to him. When they reach the camp where Demsky and the other surviving members of Washington are staying, they meet Demsky, who asks if Ivan was from the probe mission as the probe had warned them of the Mites approaching Earth. Ivan tells Demsky that they are there to join his fighting force to retake the Earth but Demsky admits that he is no longer a leader and fears the aliens are too powerful. Ivan tries to persuade him by saying he killed one, which surprises the other members of his group, but Demsky refuses so Ivan and the others leave. They head back to Freedom Village, breaking the news that there is no fighting force, and Ivan says that he plans on leading the rebellion himself but Issac and the other disheartened villagers refuse to follow him. That night, Alex tries to stop the bounty hunter from raping Bizzi and when Ivan questions what happens and speaks with the bounty hunter, the bounty hunter says he is going to go back to the saw mill and tell the Mites where they are so Ivan is forced to kill him. The next day, Ivan and the others lead an attack on the saw mill, killing the bounty hunter guards and forcing the surviving ones to take cover in the guard hut. When the Mites begin firing back at them, Ivan orders his men to fall back but as the Mites give chase, Ivan reveals that the retreat was a diversion as he uses hidden weapons to kill the aliens. As Ivan reunites with Kelly, who has lost a finger due to her escape attempt, the other slaves join in the revolt and capture the bounty hunters. As they decide what to do with them, the slaves all turn to Ivan for guidance and he tells the bounty hunters that they are free to join them if they can prove their intentions, then orders them locked into the guard hut. Suddenly, a tank shows up with some more Mites and though Ivan and the others kill some of the mites, the tanks begins firing rockets at the group and they are soon captured. When the Mites’ leader arrives and questions the captives as to who led the rebellion, everyone says they are the leader but the leader says he suspects Ivan to be the real leader and orders him to be executed. Suddenly, Demsky arrives with the people from his camp and Freedom Valley and leads them into a fight with the Mites, with Ivan and the others joining in. After they finish killing all of the Mites, Demsky speaks with Ivan and thanks him for showing him the will to fight and Ivan says they need to get ready to head to the next saw mill and liberate it and continue on to the next one until all of the Mites are killed. Alex is shown to be chronicling Ivan’s adventures and as Ivan continues to liberate saw mills in the Pacific Northwest and they make their way to California, he has become know as the Great Exterminator.

I am on the fence as to how much of a parody of classic sci-fi this movie is but in either case, it is pretty entertaining. The acting was pretty good, with Bruce Campbell (Ivan) and Renee O’Connor (Kelly), reunited from their days of Xena, doing a great job with their roles. I also liked the chemistry between them but I am curious as to what would have happened if Lucy Lawless had taken the role instead of Renee, as she was initially offered it. The story honestly felt a little weak as it seemed patchworked from several classic sci-fi movies, primarily Planet Of The Apes, but there was also a nice little Spartacus moment towards the end of the movie. The special effects were laughably bad, and there were a couple of times where they reused footage in some of the battle scenes but that all added to some funny moments. It won’t end up in the annals of great sci-fi movies but it is worth a watch if you want some mindless, stupid entertainment.

Rating: 3 out of 5

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December 22nd, 2017 Movie – Swamp Women

swamp women

Just when you thought we were getting out of the swamp, another movie pulls us back in. Today’s movie is an early work from Roger Corman, and one of the movies that gave him the nickname “King of the B-Movies.” I remember seeing this on MST3K years ago and thinking that it was just terrible. I ended up owning this movie when I bought a box set of Roger Corman movies a few years ago. Let’s see how bad it is without Joel and the bots cracking jokes during it as I watch today’s movie, Swamp Women.

The plot: In New Orleans, a geologist named Bob Matthews is wandering around Mardi Gras with his friend Marie and tells her about a plot of land he is testing for oil out in the swamp. The two encounter a pickpocket named Charlie and Bob manages to catch him and turn him over to police to be booked. As Charlie is being booked, Lt. Lee Hampton is talking with Captain J.R. Goodrich about the missing diamond from a heist. Goodrich decides to send Lee undercover into prison, where she is supposed to get close to the women who stole the diamonds and go with them when they escape, in the hopes they will lead her to the diamonds. Inside the prison, Lee is made roommates with the diamond robbers, Josie Nardo, Vera, and Billie, and tells them she knows how to get out of the prison and has someone leaving a car for her. She will take them with her if they give her a cut of the diamonds. Wanting to get out of prison, the three women decide to go along with the plan and after climbing over the fence, they find the car just where Lee said it would be. As Lee is driving away, Josie is giving her directions to where they stashed some clothes and weapons and then they head out into the swamp to retrieve the diamonds only to have their boat spring a leak on them. Suddenly, they see a boat, with Bob, Marie, and a driver inside, heading towards them and they flag it down. When Vera tries to force them out of the boat, she ends up shooting the driver but before she can kill the others, Lee stops her and wrestles the gun from her. After Bob and Marie are taken out of the boat, Vera attacks Lee before Josie breaks it up and asks Lee why she stopped Vera from killing them. Lee says that they could be useful in case they run into trouble and Josie agrees to the idea. As they make their way down the swamp, Vera continues to pick fights with Lee, while Billie starts flirting with Bob. As they make camp for the night, the girls start talking about what they will do with their shares of the diamonds. At some point during the night, Billie attempts to seduce Bob but Vera grabs her and the two start fighting until Josie breaks them up. The next morning, Marie attempts to steal the boat but when Josie spots her and shoots at her, she ends up falling into the water. Lee jumps in to try and save her and Bob convinces Josie to free his hands so that he can help but they are too late as an alligator ends up eating her. When they make camp for the night, Lee secretly approaches Bob to check on him and he tells her he knows she isn’t like the others and kisses her but Lee pushes him away quickly as Vera approaches. After they keep making their way through the swamp, they eventually reach the spot where the diamonds are buried and Josie, Vera, and Billie quickly hop out of the boat to dig them up. Lee checks on Bob, then heads over to help and they soon find the chest and Josie shoots off the lock. Vera and Billie end up fighting over the diamonds and Josie breaks it up, threatening to kill them both if they don’t get it together. After making camp for the night, Vera quietly grabs the guns from the other girls while they are sleeping and then grabs the diamonds. She then approaches Bob and convinces him to go with her, threatening to shoot him if he refuses, and they quietly leave camp. When the others wake up and discover their guns and the diamonds are missing, Josie is curious about why Vera didn’t take the boat and figures that Vera wants them to follow after her so she can kill them. They eventually find Vera perched in a tree, with Bob tied up to the base of it, and Josie comes up with a plan. Fashioning a spear to use, Josie has Lee and Billie distract Vera, allowing her to throw the spear at Vera. As the girls distract Vera, a rattlesnake approaches Bob and threatens to bite him. Vera sees the snake and goes to shoot it when she is struck by the spear but she still manages to kill the snake before falling dead from the tree. The girls grab Bob and the diamonds and continue making their way out of the swamp, Josie starts getting suspicious of Lee’s refusal to kill anyone and decides to test her by telling her to kill Bob, with Billie agreeing with Josie. When Lee argues she doesn’t want to use a gun as it would attract attention, Josie pulls out her knife and plans to kill Bob but Lee begins fighting with her. Billie attempts to shoot Lee but Bob slams into her, throwing off her shot. Lee and Bob manage to knock out the two crooks and embrace and as a police boat shows up, Bob says he will stand by her side as they approach it.

Wow, this really is a bad movie. The acting was incredibly stiff and honestly pretty bad all around. The story was pretty basic but the execution of it just seemed to jump around all over the place. The lighting was pretty annoying as I know some aspects were supposed to be in the night but it was still daylight. The fight scenes between the women were pretty poorly choreographed to be honest and some of the other effects felt lacking. I did think the interjecting of wildlife footage, such as the alligators and birds in the swamp, was actually pretty good, but the scene with the rattlesnake next to Bob looked incredibly fake when compared to the footage of the snake on it’s own. I love Corman films but even I have to admit that this is one better watched while it is being “riffed”.

Rating: 1 1/2 out of 5

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December 17th, 2017 Movie – Superman/Batman: Apokalypse

superman batman apocalypse

You can’t keep a good idea down, especially when it comes to comic books, and with the ongoing run of the Batman/Superman comic, it only made sense that another movie would be made. When I heard about this movie, I was curious about it because it’s focus is on a character with an interesting history; Supergirl. There have been several heroes to use this moniker, from the original one, who died saving Superman from the Anti-Monitor during “Crisis On Infinite Earths”, to the artifical lifeform Matrix, who assumed the name in her role of guardian of a pocket universe before she joined the normal universe. And let’s not even get started with Power Girl. Anyways, a new Supergirl was introduced during the recent Batman/Superman comics and DC made an animated movie based on those comics. So let’s see how they did with today’s movie, Superman/Batman: Apocalypse.

The plot: Weeks after the destruction of the Kryptonite meteor, debris and small meteorites are still falling through the skies on Earth. In Gotham, a large object falls from the sky into the harbor and Batman heads out to investigate. Diving underwater, Batman finds several chunks of Kryptonite and a small Kryptonian craft but as he investigates the ship, a strange woman has swam up to his boat and starts climbing inside. The woman accidentally activates the boat, which takes off, and Batman, alerted to what is happening, fires a grapple at the boat and is drug along but lets go when the boat crashes into a nearby pier. Nearby, the woman, who is naked, approaches some dock workers, who start to harass her but she shoves one of them into some crates prompting another man to quickly offer her his coat before running away. The woman dons the coat and continues running, eventually being pursued by the police when she causes an accident. During the course of the chase, the woman reveals that she has powers, including super strength, invulnerability, heat vision, and flight. When Batman confronts her, she shoves him and takes off again but can’t control her flight and ends up taking out one of Gotham’s automated police blimps. Superman shows up and stops the blimp from crashing in the city while Batman subdues the frightened woman with a chunk of Kryptonite. Later, Batman is scanning the woman in the Batcave when she regains consciousness and destroys the computer. As she starts to fly off, Superman stops her and speaks to her in Kryptonian, learning that she is his cousin Kara. Superman takes her to the Fortress of Solitude in order to better learn how to act like a human but his dog Krypto doesn’t like Kara, constantly growling and attacking her, while Batman also has his suspicions, as Kara has no memories of what happened to her after Krypton exploded and very few memories of her life before that. Meanwhile, on Apokolips, Granny Goodness is testing a warrior named Treasure to see if she will be able to lead the Female Furies but when Treasure battles against the Furies (Gilotina, Mad Harriet, Lashina, and Stompa), they end up killing her. Darkseid informs Granny of the new arrival on Earth and orders her to bring Kara back to Apokolips, threatening to sic the Furies on her if she fails. Back on Earth, Clark takes Kara out to Metropolis so she can get used to being an Earth girl. As they walk through the park that night, she sees the statue of him and tells him she her powers scare her and she doesn’t want to be a hero like he is. Suddenly, Superman is attacked by a group of figures while another figure ensnares Kara with a rope and drags her away. Kara tries to use her heat vision to attack the figure, who easily blocks it while Kara loses control of her heat vision and destroys parts of the park. Superman subdues his attacker and goes to help Kara only to discover that her attacker is Wonder Woman, while Lyla (Harbinger) was the one attacking him. Wonder Woman tells Superman that she is taking Kara with her to train, pointing out the damage she caused in the park and asking what would have happened if it had been daytime when the park was full. Superman starts to object but Batman appears and tells him to trust them, as there are other reasons for them doing this. Kara is taken to Themyscira, where Diana works on training her to fight while controlling her powers but Superman, who was invited to watch a training seminar with Batman, feels it is a waste of time. As Superman and Wonder Woman argue over how best to proceed with Kara, Kara gets upset with them and leaves with Lyla, who has become her friend. Alone with Lyla, Kara vents about how controlling Superman and Wonder Woman are, even though she knows they both mean well, then suggest they go for a swim to cool off but Lyla hesitates, as she has been having continuous visions of a blonde woman lying dead in the water and worries it might be Kara. Meanwhile, Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman are discussing Lyla’s visions and the implications of them when a boom tube opens and an army of cloned Doomsdays appears through it. Wonder Woman summons her army of Amazons and, along with Superman and Batman, they proceed to fight the army of monsters. As the fight rages on, Batman realizes something isn’t right and runs off while Superman, seeing several Amazons dying during the fight, tells Wonder Woman to call them back as he uses his heat vision to disintegrate the army of Doomsdays. After catching his breath, Superman and Wonder Woman head off to look for Batman and finding him standing at the water’s edge on another side of the island. He tells them the army was a distraction and that a second boom tube opened there and as Superman approaches the body in front of Batman, he sees it is Lyla, not Kara, who had died. A glowing orb appears, showing Lyla’s last vision and they realize that Darkseid took Kara with him so Superman vows to avenge Lyla’s death and get Kara back. The three heroes go to see Big Barda, the former leader of the Furies who had defected to Earth, and enlist her help to rescue Kara and she agrees under the condition that she goes along as well. The four heroes arrive on Apokolips and after dispatching with a pair of tanks that attack them, they split up to go on their specific assignments. Barda and Wonder Woman make their way to the fight arena, where they confront Granny and the Furies and the two heroes are forced to fight with the Furies. Meanwhile, Batman heads towards Darkseid’s armory but he encounters some guard riding on giant hell hounds and is forced to deal with them first. He manages to bury them in some debris but when he reaches the armory, one of the hounds breaks through the wall and swallows him. As the guards go to check on the hound, it collapses and Batman pries open it’s jaws, then orders the guards to remove their armor. Back in the arena, Barda kills Stompa to save Wonder Woman, who moves to kill Mad Harriet but Granny orders her to surrender, as Gilotina and Lashina have captured Barda. Wonder Woman refuses, rescuing Barda, who knocks out Lashina, while Wonder Woman deals with Mad Harriet and Gilotina, then the two heroes turn their attention to Granny. Elsewhere, Superman approaches Darkseid’s throne room and demands that he release Kara and Darkseid says she is free to go if she chooses. Kara appears and when Superman tries to get her to leave, she refuses, then begins to attack him. Superman is hesitant to fight his cousin but when she continues to attack and try to kill him, he is forced to defend himself. As Darkseid watches the battle, Batman arrives and informs Darkseid that he armed all of his Hellspore bombs and threatens to blow up Apokolips unless Darkseid releases his hold on Kara. When Batman refuses to give up his demand after Darkseid beats him, Darkseids reluctantly concedes defeat, though acknowledges his respect for Batman, just as Superman defeats Kara. Returning to Earth, Kara apologizes for what happens, saying it was like being in a bad dream, and Superman says he will take her somewhere where she can just be herself. Kara pays her respects to Lyla, then thanks Diana for what she has taught her and approaches Batman and tells him her mother’s name, which she had finally remembered. Superman takes Kara to Smallville to stay with his parents but as they approach the door, Darkseid attacks them. Darkseid prepares to blast Superman with his omega beams but Kara pushes him out of the way and takes the hit. Superman then attacks Darkseid but Darkseid easily overpowers him, then blasts him into orbit with his omega beams. Believing Darkseid killed Superman, Kara begins to fight him, using what she learned on Themyscira and Apokolips to hold her own but Darkseid eventually overpowers her and knocks her unconscious. As he prepares to leave, Superman returns to face him but is distracted on seeing Kara’s motionless form. When Darkseid grabs his cape to turn him around, Superman punches him, then proceed to renew their battle. Superman injures Darkseid but Darkseid gets the upper hand and starts blasting him with his omega beams. Kara recovers and, grabbing Darkseid’s discarded Mother Box, opens a boom tube behind him and Superman uses his heat vision to blast him through it. As the two Kryptonians embrace, Kara tells him she had reprogrammed the Mother Box, sending Darkseid to freeze as he drifts aimlessly in space. Kara then tells him she knows what she wants to be but before she can tell him, the Kents arrive at the farm and look at the damage as Superman hastily introduces them to Kara and then says he will fix the damage done to the farm and home. Some time later, Superman is on Themyscira and introduces Batman, Barda, Wonder Woman, and the other Amazons to Kara, who has chosen to call herself Supergirl. She tells the assembled group that she doesn’t know if she is worthy of wearing the outfit but she will work hard to earn it. The Amazons all cheer and Supergirl smiles when she sees Batman grin in approval as he claps along with Wonder Woman and Barda as the two Kryptonians leave the island and fly back to Metropolis.

This was a bit dark but a pretty good movie none-the-less. The voice acting was really good, with Tim Daly, Kevin Conroy, and Susan Eisenberg doing a great job reprising their voice roles of DC’s famed Trinity (Superman, Batman, and Wonder Woman respectively). The one actor that surprised me was Ed Asner, as I honestly didn’t realize he voiced the character of Granny Goodness in the 90’s Superman cartoons and Justice League cartoons. The story was good, doing a decent job in showcasing the confusion that Kara faced as she was forced to deal with being on a strange new world and trying to find her own place in it. The animation was pretty good and lost a lot of the more angular designs that were in the previous movie. A good movie that is definitely entertaining to watch.

Rating: 4 out of 5

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December 15th, 2017 Movie – Superman: Doomsday

superman doomsday

In 1992, an announcement was made that rocked the comic book industry, and the world itself; DC comics was going to kill Superman. The event would become one of the most talked about events worldwide, with Superman (vol. 2) #75

superman 75(the actual comic where he died) becoming the highest selling comic of all time. As popular as the story was, it only makes sense that they would make a movie based on it. So to jump start their new line of animated films, DC decided to do just that. So let’s see how the animated version lives up to the hype from the comics as I watch today’s movie, Superman: Doomsday.

The plot: At the Daily Planet, Lois Lane and Perry White are arguing about her article on a LexCorp charity being a front, with Perry refusing to print it to avoid being sued for libel. As Lois storms out of his office, Perry says goodbye to Clark Kent, who is getting ready to travel to Afghanistan as a foreign correspondent, and Clark says goodbye to Lois before he leaves. Elsewhere, a secret LexCorp project is digging deep underground to tap into the Earth’s core as a new power source when the uncover an alien spaceship. As Lex Luthor watches from a video uplink, the workers accidentally pierce the spaceship, causing an inert gas to escape as a hologram of an alien being warns them about what is inside. When the gas is dispersed, a massive figure inside the ship suddenly breaks free and proceeds to kill everyone in the tunnel, as well as back up on the surface. Elsewhere, Superman and Lois are having a romantic getaway at the Fortress of Solitude but Lois’ thoughts drift back to Clark. She comments to Superman about how Clark seems to become more distant, physically and emotionally, the closer she gets to him and, getting suspicious, starts trying to find out more about Superman and gets upset that he won’t admit who he really is. Meanwhile, Doomsday continues making his way through the woods, killing everyone and everything he encounters, until he finally reaches Metropolis. At the same time, Luthor tells his assistant to make sure there is no sign his company was ever at the dig site, as he doesn’t want to be held responsible for unleashing Doomsday on the city. Back at the Fortress, Superman apologizes to Lois and starts to tell her who he really is when his robot servant informs him of the events in Metropolis. As Superman prepares to leave, the robot says it found mention of Doomsday in his father’s records and that it was created to be the perfect killing machine while being practically unkillable itself. Superman carries Lois back to Metropolis with him, setting her down on the roof of the Daily Planet while he flies off to face Doomsday. When he arrives at where the military is trying to stop Doomsday, Superman attempts to freeze the creature but it breaks free from the ice and begins to attack Superman. Lois and Jimmy use the Daily Planet’s helicopter to report on the story but Doomsday spots them and attacks the helicopter. Superman rescues them, knocking Doomsday into a building, then sets the helicopter down and tells Lois and Jimmy to run while he continues to battle Doomsday. Doomsday appears to get the upper hand, battering Superman to the point he is coughing up blood, but when Doomsday turns his attention onto a little girl who is crying nearby, Superman grabs Doomsday and flies up into space, then turns around and speeds back to Earth, pummeling Doomsday as they fall. The two crash into the street and Doomsday is finally killed while Superman staggers out of the crater they left before collapsing on the ground as Lois rushes to him. Superman asks if everyone is ok and when Lois tells him he saved everyone, Superman dies, with Lois and Jimmy both crying over him while in Smallville, Martha Kent breaks into tears as she watches the footage on TV. A funeral is held for Superman and as Perry walks Lois away, she notices Martha leaving as well. Meanwhile, Jimmy is approached by the head of a tabloid, who offers Jimmy a job which Jimmy accepts. As Perry tells Lois to take some time off and go be with family, Lois decides to travel to Smallville to see Martha. Unsure of how much she might know about her, Lois stammers her way through an introduction but Martha, suspicious at first, takes pity on her and invites her in to talk. Meanwhile, Mercy tells Luthor that everything was taken care of so there is no sign of their involvement at the dig site and Luthor kills her so she won’t become a loose end. When the Toyman kidnaps a bus full of kids, Lois heads to the rooftop he is holding them on and tries to get them to safety. She is spotted as she is saving the last girl and Toyman throws the bus off the roof but Lois, and the rest of the onlookers, are surprised when she is rescued by Superman. Superman sets the bus down and goes after Toyman, defeating his giant mechanical spider and dropping him in front of the police before flying off with Lois. Lois asks how he is back and he says he isn’t sure, just that he woke up in darkness. When he drops her off at her apartment, Lois kisses Superman but he doesn’t kiss her back and Lois gets concerned. Meanwhile, Superman heads LexCorp to confront Luthor, who tricks him into entering a room lit by red sunlight and proceeds to beat him up with Kryptonite laced gauntlets. After rendering Superman unconscious, Luthor tells him that he is doing a good job in pretending to be Superman. Luthor then heads to another room, where he has the Superman’s body kept in a stasis chamber, and reveals that he cloned Superman so that he can take the glory for his accomplishments. As time passes, Lois and Martha both get suspicious about Superman as there has been no sign or contact from Clark to either of them. At LexCorp, Luthor goes to mock Superman’s body again only to discover that it is missing. At the Fortress of Solitude, Superman awakens and finds the robot tending to him, explaining that his biology had slowed his metabolism to a crawl in order to heal. He then explains about the clone but says it is best to leave it be for now, as it is helping the people of Metropolis, and instead he should focus on healing. Back in Metropolis, the clone sees a news broadcast of the Toyman having escaped custody and killing a kid before he is recaptured. Superman heads to the police station and grabs the captured Toyman, then flies him up into the air before letting him go, where he falls to his death. As the clone starts behaving more totalitarian in his dispensing of justice, Luthor hands him a list of people that might have stolen Superman’s body and tells him to find it discreetly, warning the clone he can kill him if he gets out of line. The clone leaves LexCorp and heads to a beauty salon, where he uses a mirror to examine himself and discovers a small, lead sphere in his brain. Realizing that it must contain Kryptonite inside, the clone uses his heat vision to burn a hole in his head, then removes the sphere. Back at the Fortress, Superman is in a chamber that is accelerating his solar absorbtion as he continues to heal and regain his strength. Lois heads to LexCorp to ask Luthor how he got Superman to be his puppet and when Luthor attempts to seduce her and kisses her, she drugs him and knocks him unconscious. Lois and Jimmy then find the files and secret room, where Luthor has created dozens of clones. Luthor regains consciousness and admits he is making the clones as his own personal police force, then prepares to kill them when the clone arrives. Luthor attempts to kill the clone but when the detonator doesn’t work, he notices the scar on the clone’s forehead and realizes that he removed the safeguard. The clone proceeds to destroy all of the other clones and computers in the room, then tells Lois and Jimmy to evacuate while he goes after Luthor. Luthor heads into his red sun room and challenges the clone but the clone simply seals Luthor into the room, then pulls it free from the building before throwing it down to the ground, seemingly killing Luthor. Back at the Fortress, the robot informs Superman about what is happening and Superman says he has to go back. The robot warns that he is not at full strength and the clone could kill him again, then hands him Luthor’s Kryptonite gun to use as a way to even the playing field. Back in Metropolis, the military is called in to deal with the clone but he easily destroys all of their vehicles. Superman arrives, wearing a black solar suit to help him recharge, and he speaks with the clone first before they start fighting. Superman tries to shoot the clone with the Kryptonite gun but the clone quickly knocks it away and they begin fighting. Lois and Jimmy start to cover the action but when it seems like the clone is getting the upper hand, Lois heads off to get the Kryptonite gun. As the clone goes to kill Superman, Lois shoots the clone with the gun but before she can fire another shot, the clone destroys the gun, sending the Kryptonite cell falling into some tar. Superman renews his fight with the clone but the clone overpowers him. As the clone grabs the Superman memorial to crush Superman with, Superman sees the Kryptonite cell stuck to the clone’s chest and uses his heat vision to cause it to explode, sending a cloud of Kryptonite smoke to surround the clone. The clone falls to the ground with the memorial falling on top of him and as the clone staggers away from the smoke, he collapses in front of Superman, begging him to protect the people. Lois approaches Superman, wanting to know if he is the real Superman, and when Superman kisses her, she accepts he is the real Superman. Superman is worried that the people of Metropolis won’t be so accepting of him but when a kid approaches him and asks if he will go back to wearing his normal uniform, Lois says she isn’t worried as more people approach Superman. Back at Lois’s apartment, Superman emerges from her shower as she is writing an article. When he corrects a spelling mistake in her article, he comments about being the Smallville Elementary spelling bee champ and when she turns to face him, she sees he has put on his glasses to reveal to her that he is Clark. Lois kisses him, then tells him to call his mother as they embrace while back at LexCorp, Luthor is shown to have survived and is recuperating from his injuries while thinking of his next plan to destroy Superman.

I am of mixed opinions about this movie. I mean, the death, and return, of Superman was a months long affair in the comics and to condense it down to 77 minutes definitely means a lot of stuff out. That being said, this wasn’t that bad of a movie. The voice acting was good, with Adam Baldwin (Superman), Anne Heche (Lois) and James Marsters (Luthor) doing good jobs voicing their characters. Obviously, the story is not going to be like the comics but it wasn’t too bad. I did like that they included a brief scene of the tattered cape hanging from a pole (as seen in the cover above). I also liked that they included the clone aspect from the comics, though in this case it was a full grown copy while in the comics, it was a half Superman, half Luthor hybrid that became Superboy. My favorite part was the brief voice cameo that Kevin Smith had, where he commented about the giant mechanical spider as this was a nod to when he was working on a Superman movie in the late 90’s and the producer kept insisting that he add a giant spider to it. The animation in this was pretty good and the lighting kept the movie pretty dark and gritty, which helped keep with the rather somber tone of the movie. It is not as good as the comics, but it is a decent movie and worth watching.

Rating: 2 1/2 out of 5

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