You know, sometimes I have to question my intelligence in buying movies sometimes. See, when I first heard about this movie, I was optimistic about it because the story it is based on is such an iconic story. However, after I saw the trailers, that optimism started to diminish. After hearing from my friends that saw the movie, I decided not to see it in theaters. I honestly wasn’t even going to buy the movie, but when an “Ultimate Edition” Blu-Ray came out, which was supposed to make some plot elements more clear, my dumb ass decided to buy it. So let’s all laugh at my stupidity over buying today’s movie, Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice.
The plot: During the Kryptonian attack on Metropolis, Bruce Wayne flies in on a helicopter and races to his company’s building in the city, calling his friend Jack and having him evacuate everyone. Making his way through the city, Bruce gets to the building just as the building is severely damaged by Superman and Zod’s battle and witnesses it falling apart. Bruce does his best to save some of the people that are trapped by the debris, while staring helplessly at Superman and Zod as they continue fighting in the sky. 18 months later, some kids are diving in the Indian Ocean, where the World Engine had started to terraform the Eart, and discover a strange green rock. Elsewhere, Lois Lane meets up with Jimmy Olson on an assignment to interview a general who is rebelling against his country’s government. As they are brought to the general’s hideout, Lois begins interviewing him and Jimmy is about to take pictures but is stopped by Anatoli Knyazev, a contractor that is helping to supply the general with weapons, who takes apart Jimmy’s camera to reveal a tracking device. Jimmy reveals that he is CIA and the general kills him, then takes Lois prisoner. While he is inside, Anatoli and his men begin killing the general’s soldiers, then burn the bodies and leave as a drone strike is about to hit. Superman arrives, destroying the missile and drone, then flies down and rescues Lois. A congressional hearing is held, where a witness blames Superman for the deaths of the men in her village and Senator Finch plans to hold Superman accountable for his actions. In Gotham City, two police officers are called in to check out a disturbance. When they get there, they find several Asian women in cages and as they go to free them, they hear a scream coming from the floor above them. One of the cops goes to check it out and sees a criminal chained to a radiator with a bat symbol branded on him and the Batman hanging in the corner of the room, who quickly leaves when the cop shoots him. Lois returns to Metropolis and as she unpacks from her trip, Clark shows up and she tells him about the hearings but he doesn’t care as he didn’t kill the people in the village. In Gotham, Bruce heads down to the Bat Cave, where Alfred is working on Bruce’s new armor, and says he needs to find Anatoli, as he will lead him to a criminal known as the White Portuguese. Seeing the headline of the criminal being branded, Alfred warns Bruce not to let his feeling of helplessness over the Kyptonians cause him to become to cruel in his methods. Back in Metropolis, Senator Finch and her aides head to Lexcorp and meet with Lex Luthor. Lex tells her about Kryptonite and wants her to give him an import license for the rock found in the Indian Ocean, saying it can be weaponized and used as a deterrent against Superman. Finch refuses but her aide talks with Luthor and says he will make it happen. Luthor also tells him that he wants access to the wrecked Kryptonian ship and Zod’s body. Meanwhile, Wallace Keefe, the man Bruce saved during the attack, is now an amputee and climbs atop the monument of Superman and spray paints “False God” on it. As they see news report about Wallace’s arrest, Clark is given a sports assignment in Gotham but uses the trip to try and talk to the woman that was speaking against him, where he learns about the Batman. Returning to Metropolis, Clark tries to convince Perry to write about Batman but Perry refuses. Lois shows Perry a bullet from the attack in the desert and says it is a prototype military round and convinces Perry to let her go to DC to follow up on it. Bruce manages to clone Anatoli’s phone during an illegal fight and learns that Anatoli has been in contact with Luthor and considers breaking into his house but Alfred says that is not necessary, as Bruce has been invited to a charity event at Luthor’s house. Bruce goes there and and sneaks down to Lex’s computers and attaches a device to one of the computers to copy Lex’s data. Heading back upstairs, Bruce runs into Clark, who asks him about Batman but as they are talking, Lex interrupts them and speaks briefly with Bruce. Bruce heads back downstairs to retrieve the device and Clark follows him but is distracted by a news report of a deadly fire in Mexico and rushes off to deal with that. Bruce gets to the computer room and finds the device is missing and notices a woman watching him through the glass but as he tries to confront her, she quickly leaves. As the conversations continue about Superman’s actions, Clark becomes unsure as to what he should do. In DC, after Lois is unable to get any information about the bullet, she goes to see Swanwick, who says she is trying to invent a story to restore Superman’s image. Meanwhile, Bruce attends a museum gala and runs into Diana Prince, the mystery woman from Lex’s party, and she tells him that they are investigating the same man and says that she left the drive in his glove compartment. Bruce heads back to the Bat Cave and begins decrypting the information and while he does, he ends up falling asleep. Bruce has a dream where he is in a post apocalyptic world fighting against Superman and his army when he is captured and killed by Superman. Bruce wakes up only to have a strange apparition appear, saying Lois is the key and that Bruce was right about him and that Bruce should find “them”. Waking again, Bruce sees that the data is decrypted and learns that the White Portuguese is actually a ship carrying the Kryptonite to Gotham and plans to steal it to use against Superman himself. At the Daily Planet, Clark is given a package containing photos of the recently arrested criminal that was killed in prison. That night, Batman tags the truck carrying the Kryptonite then attempts to steal it but during the car chase, Superman shows up and causes the Batmobile to crash. Superman rips the hatch off the Batmobile and as the two heroes face each other, Superman tells Batman to end his vigilantism and Batman asks if Superman can bleed. When the woman who claimed to have witnessed Superman attacking the village sees Anatoli talking to some of the people from her apartment, she gets scared and goes to see Senator Finch, telling her the truth about what happened. Meanwhile, Swanwick meets with Lois and tells her that the bullet came form Lexcorp and Superman is being set up. As the Senate hearing is being televised, Bruce sees Wallace at the hearing and asks why he isn’t getting his relief checks only to learn that he was sending them back with messages written out to Bruce. Lois tries to get Perry to run her story but he refuses without a source going on record. Superman arrives at the Capital to attend the Senate hearing and when he enters the room, Senator Finch begins speaking but stops as she realizes that Luthor set her up and turns to look at Wallace and Superman follows her gaze just as Wallace’s wheelchair explodes. Superman helps with rescuing the survivors for a while, then catches Lois’ eye and quickly flies off. Meanwhile, Bruce sees the explosion on TV and breaks into Lexcorp’s research facility and steals the Kryptonite. When Luthor sees the video of this,as well as the Batarang left in the case, he gets a smile on his face. Bruce begins making weapons from the Kryptonite and as he does, he goes through Luthor’s files on Meta-Human’s and discovers the Diana is in the files, with a photo showing that she was alive in 1918 during WWI. Meanwhile, Luthor takes Zod’s body to the Kryptonian ship and gains access to the computer, where he initiate the Genesis chamber, using Zod’s body and his own blood as the genetic template. Lois investigates Wallace’s apartment and figures out that he was not aware of the bomb, then learns from her contact at the Pentagon that the chair was lined with lead, which would have prevented Superman from seeing the bomb. Clark climbs up to the top of a mountain to be in exile, where he sees a vision of his dad, Jonathan, while Alfred tries to talk Bruce out of fighting with Superman but Bruce refuses to listen and heads out to Gotham and turns on the Bat Signal. In Smallville, Martha is kidnapped by Anatoli and his men, who then kidnap Lois as well and take her to Lexcorp. On the rooftop helipad, Luthor taunts Lois and says that he found the best way to get to Superman was to threaten her, then proceeds to push her off the roof. Superman saves Lois from falling, then flies back up to confront Luthor. Luthor reveals that he knows who Superman is, then tells him that he wants him to fight Batman to the death and threatens to have Martha killed if he doesn’t do it, showing him pictures to prove that he has her. Luthor flies off in his helicopter, telling Superman he has less than an hour to kill Batman or else Martha dies. Clark says goodbye to Lois before flying to Gotham and she heads to the planet, where she tells Perry to get her a chopper to fly her to Gotham. Meanwhile, energy surges are flaring up around the Kryptonian ship, causing the power to flicker around the city. Diana is preparing to leave when she gets an email from Bruce, asking her about the picture, as well as sending the attachments on the other Meta-Humans that Luthor was tracking; Flash, Aquaman, and Cyborg. In Gotham, Superman flies to where Batman is waiting for him and attempts to talk to him but Batman immediately starts attacking Superman. Superman is able to easily overcome Batman’s attacks but Batman fires a grenade at Superman, which explodes and releases a Kryptonite gas that weakens him. Batman begins pummeling Superman and just as Superman starts to get his strength back, Batman shoots him with another grenade. As Superman lies battered on the ground, Batman grabs a spear with a Kryptonite tip that he fashioned and prepares to kill Superman but pauses when Superman says he is letting him kill Martha and begs Batman to save her. Lois arrives and tells Batman that Martha is the name of Superman’s mother and Batman ends up throwing the spear away. Lois explains what is going on and Superman heads back to Metropolis while Batman goes to save Martha. Batman heads to the warehouse where Martha is being held and fights his way through Anatoli’s men, then shoots the flamethrower that Anatoli is about to use and shields Martha from the explosion. Superman reaches the Kryptonian ship and confronts Luthor, who learns that Batman has saved Martha, and informs Superman that he had a backup plan, showing Superman the creature he created in the Genesis chamber and calling it his Doomsday. Doomsday moves to strike Luthor but Superman stops it and begins fighting with the creature but it easily knocks him away. When the military tries attacking Doomsday, he destroys the helicopters but is attacked by Superman, who carries him up into space. The military use that opportunity to fire a nuke at Doomsday and Superman, seeing the missile approaching, holds Doomsday in place so it will hit him. When the missile impacts, Doomsday falls to Earth but Superman is left in space, seemingly dead. Batman tries attacking the creature and realizing that it is Kryptonian in nature, leads it back to Gotham so he can use the spear to kill it. Doomsday strikes the Batwing, causing it to crash but before he can kill Batman, Diana, who had seen the events occurring on the news, shields him from the blast and knocks Doomsday back. Superman, revitalized by the sun, returns and the three begin fighting Doomsday. Meanwhile, Lois goes to retrieve the spear but ends up trapped in the flooded museum by some debris. Superman hears her struggles and goes to rescue her and retrieve the spear, then tells her that he loves her and flies off with the spear. Diana uses her lasso to snare Doomsday and Batman fires his last grenade at it to weaken the monster, allowing Superman to plunge the spear in it’s heart. Doomsday roars in pain and stabs Superman in the chest with a bone appendage that it had grown but Superman pushes the spear even further into the monsters chest and they both collapse to the ground dead. As Lois cries over Superman’s body, the police arrive at the ship and arrest Luthor for his role in the events. The next morning, the Daily Planet prints the story about Superman’s death, as well as an article about Clark’s death while covering the events in Gotham. In Smallville, Lois is laying in Clark’s bed when Martha hands her an envelope that Clark had sent there, which she opens to reveal an engagement ring. As a funeral service is held for Superman, a smaller service is held for Clark, with Lois, Perry, and some other members of the Daily Planet attending. After the service, Martha learns that Clark’s funeral was paid for by an anonymous donor and as Lois kneels by the grave, Bruce and Diana are seen watching from a distance. Bruce asks Diana to help him find the others, as they will be needed to protect the world in Superman’s absence. In a flashback, Batman pays a visit to Luthor, saying that he is having Luthor transferred to Arkham Asylum but Luthor says that it s already done, hinting that they already know that Superman is dead and will be coming. Back in Smallville, Lois drops some dirt onto Clark’s coffin and walks away but as she does, some of the dirt is shown to be levitating up off of the coffin.
Batman V Superman: Dawn Of Justice met with mostly negative reviews from the critics, holding a 27% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. The critical consensus on the site is that, “Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice smothers a potentially powerful story — and some of America’s most iconic superheroes — in a grim whirlwind of effects-driven action.” While the movie had an impressive opening weekend (earning $422.5 million worldwide), the bad word of mouth from critics and audiences caused it to set records regarding box office drop off. From Friday to Sunday of it’s opening weekend, it suffered a 58% decline in ticket sales, beating a record set by Fantastic Four (2015), and at the beginning of it’s second week, suffered a historic 81.2% drop from the previous Friday and a 68.4% drop over the weekend despite there being no significant competition that weekend. Despite all that, the movie was a box office success, earning $873.3 million off of a $250 million budget.
There is no real way for me to be objective about this movie so let me just go ahead and say it. As impressive of an action movie as it may appear, this just terrible on so many levels. While I did like Henry Cavill in Man Of Steel, he seemed too stiff and robotic in this movie. I liked Amy Adams reprisal of Lois Lane and thought Gal Gadot made a great Wonder Woman, but was honestly kind of meh regarding Ben Affleck’s portrayal of Batman and thought Jesse Eisenberg was terrible as Luthor. The story is probably the biggest problem I have with this movie. Now, I get the initial reasoning for Batman’s distrust of Superman and how he has all this power but doesn’t always consider the consequences of his actions because that is a concern that has come up in the comics numerous times. However, Batman is a genius and also known as the World’s Greatest Detective so he would have been able to figure out that he was being manipulated into the fight with Superman. Also, the whole “Martha” scene was one of the dumbest things I have seen in a long while, and considering some of the movies I own, that is saying something. The set-up for a future Justice League movie was actually pretty good, though they seem to be giving Luthor too much of a role in all of it. Then there is the whole Doomsday sub-plot, which honestly was such a waste. The creation of Doomsday in this movie aside, this is the being that KILLED Superman, and he gets relegated to about 12-15 minutes of screen time in a movie that is 3 hours long. He should be the main villain in a full movie, not simply brought in as an afterthought. The special effects for the movie were pretty good, and a lot of the action scenes were well done, though the additional abilities that they decided to give Doomsday were a bit much. All in all, this was really disappointment of a movie that most comic fans will not want to watch.
Rating: 2 out of 5