I know several people who are going to love today’s movie. Sometimes, I will buy a movie for the most random reasons. Take today’s movie for instance. I first heard about this movie during a random discussion with some friends and George Takei somehow came up and it was mentioned that George Takei had said something along the lines of this movie being one of his biggest regrets. Well that just got my interest piqued and so I decided to buy said movie. Boy am I glad I did because I might have missed out on the gem that is Ninja Cheerleaders.
The plot: At a US Army base, three ninjas sneak in and steal a katana that was being held there, taking out some of the guards that were watching the base on their way out. At Hiroshi’s martial arts school, Hiroshi congratulates Courtney, April, and Monica on retrieving the sword, which was a symbol of his order, and declares them to have officially earned the title of ninja and hands them each a katana of their own. The three girls attend Los Lamos Malos Junior College but have plans to attend Brown University if they are able to earn enough money for it. After being hit on by some of their fellow students, as well as Red, their cheerleader coach, the girls head to Hiroshi’s for their martial arts class, and witness Hiroshi handing a box containing the sword to another man. That night, they head to work at Hiroshi’s strip club, where the girls work as go-go dancers. During their act, they see Hiroshi talking with a man and April manages to sneak the gun out of the man’s jacket and give it to Manny, the bouncer, who escorts the man out of the club. After handing their night’s earnings to Hiroshi to place in the bank, Hiroshi informs them that if they win the strip off the next day, the prize money added to what they have earned at his club will give them enough money to go to Brown, meaning this could be their last night at the club. When they leave the club, Courtney and April wind up fighting with four Navy men, who try to convince the girls to sleep with them, while a fifth man refuses to get involved and watches the fight with Monica. Heading to Monica’s house to study for their finals, Monica’s mom says she received a letter from Brown and Monica opens it to learn that she was accepted, which makes her mom happy as she didn’t approve of her working at the club. The next day, during their lunch break from finals, the girls head to the dojo for a workout only to find the place trashed. Seeing no one there and not getting an answer at the club, they head there and find Manny lying on the ground. Courtney calls for an ambulance and notices that the safe is missing from behind the bar, and Manny tells the girls to leave as he doesn’t want them to get involved in this. Leaving the club, Courtney tells the others about the missing safe and April gets upset over the thought of having to continue dancing to earn the money back. The three go to see Jimmy the Snitch, the man Hiroshi was talking with the night before, and they learn that Victor Lazarro ordered Hiroshi to be taken. April wants to go after Lazarro right away but Courtney and Monica convince her that they need to finish their finals in order to get to Brown. After finals, they are getting ready to leave the campus but find Detective Harris by Monica’s car, who starts to question them but the girls play dumb and he ends up leaving. Finding out Manny’s condition, the girls head to the hospital to visit him and April storms off when Manny says that they can’t handle dealing with the mob. Courtney and Monica find April, who was using a computer to look up information about Lazarro and they learn that the strip club used to be Lazarro’s club house before he was arrested for racketeering. Leaving the hospital, they find Detective Harris waiting for them, who knows they lied earlier and he handcuffs them and places them in his car, planning on arresting them for obstruction but the girls escape when he goes to get Manny’s statement. The girls head out to get the music they need for the competition and their cheerleader uniforms for the night’s game, with Courtney having to deal with her drunk step-father when she grabs their uniforms. Going back to the dojo, Courtney and Monica confront April about her increasing hostility and then they grab some weapons to use when they confront Lazarro and April sees the deed to the club and realizes that is what Lazarro is after. The girls head to Lazarro’s house and confront him but Lazarro knows they won’t kill him and tells them to call him when they have the deed and after they leave, Lazarro talks with Kenji, a female ninja he hired to deal with the girls. The girls head to the game, telling Lazarro they will make the exchange there and during the game, the girls meet with four of Lazarro’s men in the locker room. Red shows up and starts yelling at the girls to get back out on the field and one of Lazarro’s men quickly knocks him out. The girls then deal with the men, but Monica is hurt during the fight. Afterwards, they threaten to torture one of the men and he tells them where Hiroshi is being held but they turn around to find Kenji there threatening to kill the girls. Detective Harris shows up but Kenji quickly shoots him in the shoulder with a crossbow and the girls use the distraction to escape. They head to the strip off to compete and then head out to the warehouse that Hiroshi is being held. As the girls start taking out Lazarro’s men, Lazarro decides to kill Hiroshi but Hiroshi escapes from his restraints and after a brief fight, shoots Lazarro with his own gun just as the girls enter the room. Kenji shows up and the girls start fighting with her and at one point, April stops the fight in order to take a call where she is told that they won the competition. Resuming the fight, Kenji is easily able to overpower the girls but when she disarms one of them, Hiroshi picks up the sword and challenges Kenji. Hiroshi and Kenji start fighting and as sparks start flying from the sword strikes, Hiroshi uses the electricity to stun Kenji long enough for him to disable her. Detective Harris and some other police arrive and take Hiroshi and the girls to the police station but Detective Harris decides to not arrest them and let them go. The next day, the girls get into Monica’s car, which is loaded with their bags, and head off to Brown while the assistant D.A. goes to see Lazarro’s father and tells him that no charges are being filed against Hiroshi and the girls and Lazarro’s father says that he will kill Hiroshi and the ninja cheerleaders.
This is definitely one of those so bad it’s good movies and happens to be a favorite of not just myself, but several of my friends as well. The acting was fairly decent, with Trishelle Cannatella (Courtney), Ginny Weirick (April), and Maitland McConnell (Monica) doing a good job going back and forth between being serious one minute, and then playing either dumb or flirty the next. Larry Pointdexter (Detective Harris) and Michael Pare (Lazarro) were also good and while Natasha Chang was pretty bad in playing Kenji as too robotic and speaking in third person, I think George Takei was just having fun with this as he didn’t seem to take the movie too seriously. The story was fairly simplistic and I did like the clips of the girls in the police interrogation room but there were a lot of different tangents that I know most people will think are stupid, such as going to the strip off after leaving the game instead of going to save Hiroshi. The fight scenes were honestly not that good and looked really slow compared to other martial arts movies. This is by no means an Oscar caliber movie but it is definitely a fun movie to just turn your brain off and watch.
Rating: 3 1/2 out of 5