I am so sick of the back and forth temperature changes that have been going on the last few weeks. Sunny and warm one day. Freezing and dreary the next. The constant flux has been messing with my head and sinuses since the year started and I would like for it to stop. Of course, that is what winters in Georgia are, a constant series of temperature changes. So while I prepare to deal with another month of this crap, I might as well review today’s movie, Funeral Home.
The plot: Heather arrives at her grandmother’s place to help convert the former funeral home into a bed and breakfast. Things seem to be going fine until some of the guest start disappearing. On top of that, Heather has been hearing some strange noises coming from the locked cellar. Her grandmother warns her to stay away from the cellar but after being pressured by her boyfriend, the two teenagers decide to see what is really down there.
Well based on the plot, I thought this might be a decent little horror movie. Alas, this was not to be. Lesleh Donaldson (Heather) and Kay Hawtrey (her grandmother Maude) both did a good job in their roles. Alf Humphreys also stood out as the deputy who kept trying to pursue the investigation when none of his superiors believed there was a case. The small town setting helped with creating some type of atmosphere for the film. But the biggest problem this film has is the completely unoriginal plot. This movie was incredibly similar to another, and definitely more famous, slasher film that came out in 1980. In fact, there was one point where I kept expecting to hear “kill kill kill kill. kah kah kah kah.” in some of the scenes. Even the big reveal of the killer’s identity seemed ripped off. Maybe if the plot was more original, this could have been a better movie, but as it stands, this is worth passing over.
So if you want to see a watered down version of a slasher movie, then give this a shot. If you want some scares, go watch something else.
Rating: 1 1/2 out of 5